Johnny the Walrus gets first place for political float in Fairbanks. Then the parade judge had a meltdown…


The float for Fairbanks North Star School Board candidate Michael Humphrey was a winner in every way. It was a gigantic inflated walrus that was towed behind a van in the Golden Days Parade on Saturday. Beneath the walrus’ tusks a sign said, “Johnny.”

Golden Days is the big annual festival and the parade is the largest in Alaska. Thousands attend.

The judges awarded the walrus the top prize. And then the fun started. Someone figured out that this was Johnny from the pro-child book, “Johnny the Walrus.”

One of the judges, a hardline leftist, went to Twitter to express her utter horror that she had helped Johnny the Walrus win.

She didn’t know, she said, that Johnny the Walrus was transphobic.

“So it turns out that the best political float was an anti-trans float. The judges had no idea. We had two floats to choose from for political. You know what I hate? Hateful people,” wrote “Tania” on Twitter.

“We both feel sick about it and especially on how it reflects on our community to those who don’t know that the judges DID NOT HAVE CONTEXT We thought ‘“’guy has a mustache kinda like a walrus, we’re in Alaska, that’s a walrus inflatable, ok.’”

The book “Johnny the Walrus” is written by Matt Walsh, of The Daily Wire. The description of the book’s plot on Amazon says, “Johnny is a little boy with a big imagination. One day he pretends to be a big scary dinosaur, the next day he’s a knight in shining armor or a playful puppy. But when the internet people find out Johnny likes to make-believe, he’s forced to make a decision between the little boy he is and the things he pretends to be — and he’s not allowed to change his mind. From Daily Wire personality and bestselling author Matt Walsh comes a timely tale of innocence, identity, and imagination.”

In the book, Walsh is writing about how kids have active imaginations, but that because a boy thinks he is a girl doesn’t mean he is actually a girl. The next day he might be a knight or a pirate. Let kids be kids, Walsh is saying.

But the Left has labeled the book as “transphobic.” And Walsh has been targeted by the left for particular vitriol.

“Johnny the Walrus” can be found at three libraries in Alaska — the Anchorage Loussac Library, Sitka, and Seward.

Humphrey’s campaign page, meanwhile, says he will work on:

  • Protecting children by stopping the spread of radical gender ideology
  • Creating opportunities for more parental involvement in school
  • Targeted budget control with the goal of smaller class sizes and teacher salaries that keep up with the cost of living

A father of six, Humphrey is a Marine veteran who describes his politics as conservative. He and his wife have been married for 15 years.

One anonymous person on social media chimed in bravely, calling Humphrey a disgusting candidate.

As for the parade judge’s meltdown, it went largely unnoticed in Fairbanks, as there was a rubber ducky race to attend on Saturday, with 8,000 yellow rubber ducks, all of undetermined gender, heading down the Chena River in search of the $10,000 prize.


  1. Oh my goodness. I am absolutely horrified that Johnny won and feel so bad for “Tania”. She needs to get real, get a life, and quit hating people for what they believe in.

  2. How did Fairbanks get such a hair-brained judge? Is she really saying that because she doesn’t like the message or candidate, she would have voted otherwise had she known? She would have applied her own politics to her vote instead of giving an award to a creative political float? Hey Golden Days, go get your village idiot and have a little time-out chat before she embarrasses you again.

    • Yep, fully agree. Creativity doesn’t have a gender identity, but Johnny the Walrus is a kid’s pretending that the left really doesn’t like. Heaven forbid, we can’t let kids be kids!!!

      • You are correct. We need politicians who actually come out and state that “Let Kids be Kids” and quit pushing them to be confronted with the leftist “adult” list of how the world should be.

    • Bullwinkle,
      You’re spot on, except maybe calling her “hare-brained” might be overly harsh to hares. But one of the key traits of a leftist is a lack of self-awareness. Yes, she absolutely would vote her political beliefs instead of a valid assessment of artistic merit. Her meltdown is classic.

  3. Pity for those walruses who are gender confused with nobody to cheer them on. PETA would not likely be tolerant of efforts to help these poor creatures.

  4. If the anger of the alphabet radicals wasn’t so comical of itself, we could have a lot of fun with this… The photo at the top looks more like Jabba the Hutt than a walrus, but the pic at the bottom clarifies. As for the criticism from the a.r. crowd – get over it – stop molesting kids and stop trying to persuade kids that they are something different than they were conceived. When they are old enough to make permanent life altering decisions is soon enough. Time to support Mr. Humphrey – he has my vote.

  5. Michael Humphrey has already earned my vote and huge donation for inadvertently ruining the judges day and reputation.
    I am writing out a check now for at least $500 bucks to help this guy who obviously has a lot of idiots out there trying to thwart his mission to childrens safety and a quality educational experience.

    And by the way Golden Day coordinators…who the hell did you consult for judges? Constant Rivera Sam Brinton???

    UAF is turning out judges like her by the droves. My daughters absolutely hated going to class there and having to put up with idiots like her and listen to woke professors preaching their “gospel”.
    Way too many “Liberal Larrys” at UAF being funded with public money!

  6. This type of crap is how a man wins the Miss Nevada and Miss Netherlands beauty contests.
    Let that sink in for a minute… the prettiest girl in Nevada is a boy. Same in the Netherlands. Because woke trumps reality.

    • There’s an alternate explanation.

      What if the judges in NV and Netherlands were real fans of the old girls only rules? What if selection of trans for both contests were their way of protesting the new rules? Kind of an HL Mencken giving the contest sponsors their new rules, good and hard. Cheers –

  7. Too funny!
    Ignorant liberal upset that she is ignorant, while being neither diverse nor tolerant of views not her own!
    What really saddens me is that these zealots suck the fun out of being a kid or watching your children spread their wings with imagination and spunk.

  8. It really must be difficult being a leftist. You have to keep track of absolutely everything, no matter how arcane, in order to virtue signal at all times and all places. I believe the quote was that consistency is the hobgoblin of the small minded.

    • You are giving the leftists too much credit.
      It is really easy to virtue signal about literally everything. Remember when some talking head declared the word “apartment” was racist? Yeah… it IS that simple.
      It does not matter what it is, a leftist will see it as offensive.
      Woke is the state of being where one sees offense in everything, except their own behavior.

      • I qualified as a racist for buying my grand daughter a coloring book. I had to return it and buy an of-coloring book.

  9. The real question is, where do you purchase a giant inflatable walrus in the first place? 🙂

  10. Tania” You know what I hate? Hateful people,” Who is the real hater? Is she too dumb to figure?

    • He has and it’s getting national attention.

    • Yup: ‘

    • The parade judge lefty is a hater of people she disagrees with. She made this admission public.
      So, she hates people who protect children from perversion and sexual misconduct? This judge will be identified and tossed. As for the walrus:
      I’m campaigning with him and voting for all the candidates who vow to protect children from these LGBTQ predators.

  11. Dare I mention a time honored joke in Alaska? I was hoping maybe the commenter Oosik Puk would come on here so I didn’t have to use the word. I mean, how do we know it was a male walrus?

    • Typically a males tusk set are wider at the tip than the base and females are closer at the bottom than the top.

      That has been the known science but as of late there has been dispute and confusion in Walrus World (Wally World). A select few of females have been spotted with tip extensions that turn outward as well as males have altered their tusks to actually touch and cross over each other at the bottoms in extreme cases.

      This revelation has the wildlife biology community stunned beyond belief that gender confusion and transformation has entered the walrus species as well as humans.
      In fact the CDC and WHO have been given gazillions of dollars to prove it is actually contagious and will soon affect all species of animals/mammals.
      Conclusion: While some species of birds and animals mate for life their are a few who like to let their oosik roam.

    • Gretchen, it clearly is a MALE, look at the Tusks and the size of the thing… Please find Oosik’s comment to that CCmbtek fellow above.
      Is the Parade adjudicator suffering from Oosik envy? You be the Judge here.

  12. Give this man a medal and make him a state senator!

    And Matt Walsh has noticed 😁

  13. I love this guy – Michael Humphrey. Great sense of humor, tweaking the radical leftists in a good natured way. But the leftists can’t laugh at themselves.

  14. A hunch led me down the rabbit hole. Since she locks down her tweets, I clicked on the link in the profile. I hope you did too and saw the cover image saying “Be nice or I will stab you”. Did I say I had a hunch? Well, that happens to be the same cover image found on the Facebook page of Tania Clucas. If you’re not familiar with the political scene in Fairbanks, she’s another one of those Democrats who’s extremely grateful for the enormity of government and the nonprofit sector and how it enables her existence.

    • It was Agriculture and School of Mines. Now they sit around growing and smoking pot and dream of finding a lithium/cobalt mine nearby for their EV batteries. UAF is a sad, lefty school for Democrats who only think they are being educated.

  15. That nasty parade judge Tania runs the Morris Thompson Cultural and Visitors Center in Fairbanks, and is part of the nonprofit leftist mafia up here. She should really close up her social media accounts, she is hurting her organization with all her hateful spewing. Tania outright admits she would have not made the award had she known the entry was something she disagrees with. What a piece of work. Anyone who has ever worked with her knows how she operates. Thanks, Michael Humphrey, for giving the leftists a chance to show us who they really are.

  16. The irony of Leftists, is that nobody hates as virulently as those who claim to be anti hate.
    Like all Leftists, Tania took every last shred of self awareness that she may have once had, and burned it in a funeral pyre.
    Now she can be a good little Leftist, because she hasn’t a shred of self awareness.

  17. Tania: “You know what I hate? Hateful people.”
    Looks like by her own definition “of hateful people” she hates herself. There lies the problem. Leftists hate themselves and most everything else.

  18. Tania Clucas, being the rage- and hate-filled person she shows herself to be, makes me wonder what other nastiness she gets up to. I’ve heard of things happening at the Morris Thompson Cultural and Visitors Center in Fairbanks. It’s dangerous and alarming that she works in such a public capacity. Frightening.

  19. In 1961 President Eisenhower, as he was leaving office, made a famous speech warning about two trends. The one that got all the attention at the time and has ever since, was about the “Military-Industrial Complex”. However the other was just as important, but has been ignored, that was the federal funding of University projects creating a “scientific-technological elite”. At the time he was focusing on the development and use of technology being influenced by government and politics, but of course this also opened the door for funding bureaucracy and political influence at the university level across the board as we can clearly see today. Government money feeds political corruption and since controlled by a bureaucracy, is not responsive to the vast majority of citizens. Once in place at the University level, it’s almost impossible to vote it out.

    • I should have mentioned that people like Tania Clucas are products of left-wing establishments in Fairbanks and other University towns that are created and sponsored via the large University populations there which have been the beneficiary of so much government money in the past and now the present.

  20. The only hateful person here is her. She is a delusional leftist psychopath that approves of 3rd trimester abortions. Enough said. What she should be horrified by is this thieving clown show in DC.

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